i remember a initial moment of this ongoing lesson 5 years ago
the friend who taught me the meaning of friendship showed me a video
the guy in it was talking about how much it doesn't matter what other people say about us
if it's good or bad
that it always only says something
about the other person's judgment and perception of us
but nothing more than that
he gave examples and said after every one:"...NONE OF MY BUSINESS!"
i loved how he said it! it was much fun
the ideas that it also has nothing to do with us when
other judge us to be good in something
was new for me
yesterday i got a new insight on this lesson
on the "felt-knowledge-level"
...based on the superpower of self acceptance
meaning, that when we accept our mistakes
the criticism of another person can't really hurt us
so much
we can be able to be relaxed about comments
which goes along with the side effect of
opening the door for the other person too
to learn their lesson
if they want to
anyways
this is all nice to know in theory
but not easy to adapt in daily life
especially
when one is used to focus on self reflection for improvement
which also implies a history/ tendency to be more negative towards oneself
ups, sorry, i can only talk for myself, ...towards myself
it is often very challenging to see the good about myself
while exercising on self acceptance on a day-to-day basis
something unexpected happened yesterday
let me tell you how my process usually works, as far as i know:
⏏ recognising what i don't like
(i trained/am training myself to
be as self-reflected as possible
because i urgently need/ed
to change many things)
⏏ allowing myself to accept the side I don't like
(without urging to change it immediately
which is something relatively new)
⏏ feeling more relaxed about it
well, the unexpected case was that i was able to look further, without forcing me to,
it just happened:
⏏ i recognized what i don't like
⏏ i allowed myself to accept it
⏏ was feeling more relaxed about it
⏏ i found a good side behind it
⏏ i felt amazed and absolutely grateful
⏏ i could really see how much more judgment says about the choice of seeing the good or bad in another, from my perspective as well as the one from the other person
⏏ i felt more free to accept myself
well, i actually think this is very important for me
to be better able in contributing my part
to heal racism in this world
with the nice side effect of
living a more fulfilled life
now i am planning on going further every time
because i can feel it's true that in every aspect there is also
a positive side hidden
i am going to search for it
in the long term i won't only be able do it with me
but also with others
i hope
therefore:
⏏ searching for the good side behind it
PS. if anyone know what video "NONEOFMYBUSINESS" i am talking about (it's a guy from the Bay Area in the US, I think), please, let me/us know!!
achja, if you are interested in the moment after realising this part of the ongoing lesson enjoy this very annoying, confusing and irritating video
the friend who taught me the meaning of friendship showed me a video
the guy in it was talking about how much it doesn't matter what other people say about us
if it's good or bad
that it always only says something
about the other person's judgment and perception of us
but nothing more than that
he gave examples and said after every one:"...NONE OF MY BUSINESS!"
i loved how he said it! it was much fun
the ideas that it also has nothing to do with us when
other judge us to be good in something
was new for me
yesterday i got a new insight on this lesson
on the "felt-knowledge-level"
...based on the superpower of self acceptance
meaning, that when we accept our mistakes
the criticism of another person can't really hurt us
so much
we can be able to be relaxed about comments
which goes along with the side effect of
opening the door for the other person too
to learn their lesson
if they want to
anyways
this is all nice to know in theory
but not easy to adapt in daily life
especially
when one is used to focus on self reflection for improvement
which also implies a history/ tendency to be more negative towards oneself
ups, sorry, i can only talk for myself, ...towards myself
it is often very challenging to see the good about myself
while exercising on self acceptance on a day-to-day basis
something unexpected happened yesterday
let me tell you how my process usually works, as far as i know:
⏏ recognising what i don't like
(i trained/am training myself to
be as self-reflected as possible
because i urgently need/ed
to change many things)
⏏ allowing myself to accept the side I don't like
(without urging to change it immediately
which is something relatively new)
⏏ feeling more relaxed about it
well, the unexpected case was that i was able to look further, without forcing me to,
it just happened:
⏏ i recognized what i don't like
⏏ i allowed myself to accept it
⏏ was feeling more relaxed about it
⏏ i found a good side behind it
⏏ i felt amazed and absolutely grateful
⏏ i could really see how much more judgment says about the choice of seeing the good or bad in another, from my perspective as well as the one from the other person
⏏ i felt more free to accept myself
well, i actually think this is very important for me
to be better able in contributing my part
to heal racism in this world
with the nice side effect of
living a more fulfilled life
now i am planning on going further every time
because i can feel it's true that in every aspect there is also
a positive side hidden
i am going to search for it
in the long term i won't only be able do it with me
but also with others
i hope
therefore:
⏏ searching for the good side behind it
PS. if anyone know what video "NONEOFMYBUSINESS" i am talking about (it's a guy from the Bay Area in the US, I think), please, let me/us know!!
achja, if you are interested in the moment after realising this part of the ongoing lesson enjoy this very annoying, confusing and irritating video